Sometimes looking back at the roads we traveled, the chances we took, I have to wonder why we survived.
From lost in Helmetta to 2 am runs three towns over, what were we looking for? What were we hoping to find?
Crazy.
I don't know if it was the time of society or the time of our youth that we got away with so much, but insanity sure fed our useless ambitions. Ambitions to nowhere. No goals ruled our crowd, no hope for anything but the right here, right now.
Who the hell were we?
Now almost 40 years later I look back and wonder where the time went. Why decisions weren't made differently. Decisions to move forward instead of just going with the flow. College should have come first. It's my biggest regret. Although I did some college later in life I know if I had gone during those young and crazy years, if I had chosen my goal then, I'd be more satisfied now.
Yes, I do know that. In my soul.
What do you want to be when you grow up?
The question they throw at you when you're barely 5 or 6 years old. When you don't know anything about the world or the possibilities it contains. Why aren't kids exposed to more of the world before they're asked that question? I think it would change a lot of lives.
I knew.
When I was 5 or 6 and asked that question my answer was always "an artist."
I knew it then.
"Oh dear, artists don't make any money, pick something else."
As if it were that easy.
Now I know who I am but I'm not where I want to be or would be had I been encouraged instead of told to "pick something else."
To be who you are meant to be is a sense of freedom. To be encouraged allows dreams to launch. You're okay! You can do this! Keep going!